Foxfire: A Mini-Recap

-Film: Foxfire

-Year: 1996

-Character: Ethan Bixby

-Amount of Screentime: A nice little chunk at the beginning, then he pops up here and there until he suddenly disappears.

-Summary in Fifty Words or Less: We broke the Naked Time-o-meter.  AND the WTF?!?-o-meter.  ’nuff said.  Here’s to the awesomest film intro EVER!!!

-Kate’s Thoughts: Now, contrary to what all some of you may be thinking, we are very srs bsns on this website.  Any Naked Time videos we may post are for SERIOUS RESEARCH PURPOSES.  That’s the only reason we posted the above video.  SERIOUS.  RESEARCH.  PURPOSES.

Ahem.

Foxfire is what happened if the girls from The Craft start acting all Girl, Interrupted and go Heathers on the school.  That made sense, right?  Well how about this…a young Angelina Jolie is in it and L7 is on the soundtrack.  Now THAT explains everything!

Bitch be cray-cray!

Our poor little WTF-o-meter got dinged up a little watching this movie as well…the dissection scene…shudder.  Oh, and the scene where all the girls ripped their shirts and bras off so Angelina can jailhouse-tattoo their boobs.

This is also how Brits and I pass the time when we’re bored on roadtrips.

Although PFach isn’t in it much (he plays the boyfriend of the demure lady up on the right), I was pleasantly surprised that I enjoyed Foxfire as much as I did.  It’s got a very Threesome vibe to it (minus the group-sex element) in terms of early 90′s Generation X angst, and the soundtrack is also awesome in that same vein.

Plus, with The Craft + Girl, Interrupted + Heathers + Threesome = Foxfire means you kinda get five movies all in one!  Talk about maximizing your movie-watching time!  So what are you waiting for, quit watching that intro video on repeat and go watch Foxfire!  One and a half boob-tattoos from this twin!

-Brits’ Thoughts:

Oh dear… I think my twin and I need to take boob-tattoos off of the roadtrip itinerary, since we have “TWINS TAKE NYC 2012″ coming in September! (More on that later… *thinks of other activities to partake in while roadtripping it across the country*)

So….Foxfire! This one has been on our radar for quite some time, since some of you perverts out there (not us or anything, jeez) have stumbled across Mr. Facinelli’s junk in the trunk on occasion while searching for his body(s)…ahem, of work. Besides Blue Peter Facinelli Ass, this is the most famous of all the naked times!

*Hums Single Ladies*   Wow, look at that lovely foliage….

Like my twin said up above, this movie has a lil’ bit of naked romping about involving PFach, and a whole boatload of WTF is up with cray-cray Angelina Jolie!?!? Seriously you guys, if you weren’t Team Aniston before, you probably will be after this movie, just sayin’. And the fuckery doesn’t stop there!

The frog dissection scene will have you literally squirming in your seat (and not in the way our recaps usually have you squirming, heh heh), the main group of girls have some weird as hell pastimes, and the pervy teacher is so pervy that my twin and I pretty much had to pause the movie and immediately go shower to get the “ick” feeling off of us (and no, not together, despite our boob-tattooing ways…)!

But just in case you were worried this wasn’t going to be your classic 90′s movie…..LO AND BEHOLD, IT’S DASH MIHOK!!!!!

“Oh look, there’s PFach having another outdoor nude modeling session again….”

When it’s all said and done, I definitely think you should check out Foxfire. Don’t expect to see a whole lot of our boy in it, but the moments he does show up are always epic. Be sure to listen carefully, because once in awhile when he talks, Noo Yawk Fach slips through! Adorbs!

Brits’ rating:

One Spock boob tattoo and a butt slap for Naked ModelFach!!!